Do You Hate Yourself After Your Breakup?

John William Waterhouse [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons
John William Waterhouse [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

Most people don’t know what self-love is.

When they hear the word, they have this image in mind:

A handsome young man staring at his own reflection in a pool … madly in love with himself.

That’s not what self-love is.

That’s arrogance, pretension and being full of oneself.

It’s thinking that you are above all others.

That young man’s name was Narcissus, and we all know which personality disorder his name represents.

So what is self-love really, and why do we need it especially after a breakup?

Simple definition:

Self-love is loving and accepting yourself simply because of who you are.

Regardless of what you did or didn’t do, of what know or don’t know, of what others think of you or expect you to be.

You are you … special and unique.

The problem is that our self-love is in the toilet after the breakup.

Maybe we blame ourselves for what happened or we disliked the way we behaved.

How can we recover when we hate ourselves?

We can’t.

That’s why after we have DETOXed our Ex physically, our primary focus should be to work on increasing our self-love.

This is the foundation upon we build everything else:

The re-discovery of the real YOU, unaffected by the relationship and all the mess you went through your whole life.

And in the end, you can look at yourself in the mirror (unlike Narcissus) and say:

I’m so happy with myself, and I’m proud where the breakup has led me to … I’m ME, and I love you.

Can you ever imagine saying something like this to yourself?

You should.

Your friend and coach,

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