The chances are that you’ve put your Ex on a pedestal.
You are convinced that there’s no one out there who is as beautiful/handsome, intelligent, gently, knows you best, [fill in the blancs] as they are.
Maybe out of this mindset you want to see them as often as they agree to.
Just as “friends”, of course.
When you are with him/her, everything else doesn’t matter anymore.
It just feels as before.
But then, when you say “goodbye”, it’s a breakup all over again.
And every time it hurts more and more.
When you are at home – alone – and all the pain floods over you like a tsunami, you realize that this cannot go on much longer.
Every time you are with him/her, you lose a little piece of yourself.
And then you stare at them, how they stand on their pedestal …
Then you suddenly know that you’re sick and tired that they seem like your one last shot at a perfect life.
That it was YOU who put them on this pedestal in the first place … and now they won’t step down.
Are you there yet?
If yes, then you know what to do next.
If not, why not?
Ask yourself, do I want to stare at this pedestal my whole life, while they have moved on long ago?
The answer must be NO, and the solution is to kick them off this pedestal.
The solution is to get back your confidence, self-esteem, your own spark and mojo.
It belongs to you.
The first step is reaching “Acceptance” and acceptance kicks them off.
It’s (among other things) the realization that they might not be that perfect at all … that there might be a better match out there.
After that your recovery will take its course until you finally make it:
Emotional Independence.
Make sense?
Your friend and coach,
Eddie Corbano