What if you were the one who left?
When you’re in a dissatisfying relationship the heart and the mind are in constant battle.
The heart says “but I love him/her,” the mind says “it just doesn’t work out”.
This can go on for a really long time – until the kids are out of the house, or until I find a better job, etc.
Until then, living a life of silent despair.
But you have a choice here.
You can either accept everything you don’t like in this relationship and keep the man/woman that you love.
Or you can change the situation, leave them and accept all the ugly consequences.
The latter means that you miss out on all the wonderful things about them and the deep connection that you’ve shared.
But it also means that now you have a new shot at happiness and a fulfilling relationship.
There are many members in our DETOX Course who ended their relationship, they were not “dumped” … and there are three main challenges for them to meet:
- They are going through the same thing as everybody else: feeling the pain, the guilt, the anger, the emotional roller-coaster
- Going No-Contact is harder because it feels cruel to first leave and then deny them your presence
- They have to fight the constant regret of ending the relationship because they were the one who are responsible for the breakup
And the latter makes it very hard to accept.
But, they have an advantage here.
They know WHY the relationship haven’t had a chance for survival.
And herein lies the key to recovery.
Whether you fall into this category or not, there’s a lesson here.
There is always a reason behind the breakup.
Whether you are aware of the reasons or not, it’s there. And one important goal of your recovery is to find that reason and really learn from it.
I didn’t understand my reason for a long time. But when I finally did, I knew what to do to break the cycle of failed relationships.
Your friend and coach,