Last week our servers went down for almost 12 hours.
No one was able to access any page of lovesagame.com or the members area during that time.
I was really upset.
It was my wife who then reminded me of this:
How could I have forgotten this?
There was a network problem down in St. Louis where the servers are, so it was completely out of my control.
But before my wife intervened, all I did was stare at an empty screen and listen to the queue music of their support hotline.
It’s terrible to feel so helpless, not being able to do anything to manipulate the outcome.
It’s much similar to how you feel after the breakup.
Whether you have actively tried to get them back or not, you were not able to change anything.
You can’t go back and do things differently, even if you could, are you sure things would be different?
It was not your fault.
It is never one’s fault alone, a breakup is an escalated incompatibility … there are always two who play this game.
Stop worrying about things you can’t change and counteract your feeling of helplessness with ACTION.
What are good ways to take action?
Following the No-Contact Rule is really the most efficient way to take your power back after a breakup.
It shifts your mindset from “being controlled by your Ex”, to taking your life into your own hands, being and staying in control.
Another way to take action is to actively fight the mental Ex-obsessing and to not take it as granted, as unbeatable.
Because it definitely isn’t.
You CAN stop it … you just have to be determined.
Your friend and coach,